Glen Johnson May Have Improved This Weekend But He's Still In The Wrong Position

In this catastrophic season of Liverpool's, everything imaginable has gone wrong. A team that challenged for the title two years ago are now fortunate to be in the top half of the table. If there is one player who personifies the Liverpudlian inadequacies experiences this season, it has to be Glen Johnson. Like much of the team he has been in and out of the side with frustrating injuries and, when picked, he has been tame going forward and unstable in defence. Yesterday, facing his former club, he made some amends: scoring Liverpool's first goal, acting as a potent outlet down Liverpool's right, and playing his part in ensuring a clean sheet.

Johnson's good game, it must be remembered, came against West Ham - a team languishing at the foot of the table, less goals conceded by only Blackpool, and more scored than only Wigan. West Ham United are, in short, a side that should be comfortably beaten by even this Liverpool side. Its in this games, games where you can expect to dominate and press the opposition, that playing a winger in the position of a full back can be accepted. In other cases it is ridiculous.

That is what Glen Johnson is - a winger lost in the role of full back. Johnson has fantastic shooting ability, can cross the ball, and likes to (and is very able to) beat his man. Johnson however does not have a great understanding of how to defend, cannot tackle without a great risk of fouling the opposition, and is a liability when defending balls in the air. For some reason though, he is deployed in a position where his primary role is to defend, and attacking duties come on top of this. This reason is the view that modern full backs needs to be skilled in joining in attacks and provide width. Yes, fullbacks should venture forward. And yes, you want a player venturing forward to be competent in doing so, but these abilities must come as an added bonus once you have a full back that is able to defend.

A team requires stability in its defence - there must four consistent defenders in the team that can be relied on every week to minimise the chances of conceding. The wide defenders are useful for providing width during attacks, and while the team have possession they are not all that necessary at the back, but when called upon to defend it is vital that they are able to do so. A full back must be selected first and foremost for their defensive capabilities, and when a player (such as Ashley Cole) can defend and also offers great skill in attack, this is an added bonus. When a defender is picked for his non-defensive capabilities, it must be the centreback, who's passing is needed to link to the midfield and prevent the team from being pinned back, and who's aerial  prowess is often useful at both ends.

Glen Johnson has a better touch, shot and cross that Dirk Kuyt yet plays behind him. This is madness

Andy Carroll will do England proud

(firstly I'd like to welcome whatahitson's 2.5 readers back as I now have a fully functioning computer and can post again)

Andy Carroll has undoubtedly been one of the highest performing strikers in the premier league this season, following a fantastic championship campaign last season. He has been better that all of the seasoned England internationals and proved to be the most inspired signing of my fantasy league team. He has shown himself to have a good touch, strength, speed and more aerial ability than a harrier jump jet. His eye for goal has made him joint top scorer this season and he has added to this with four assists, hold up play and being the stand out player   of an impressive start to the season by Newcastle United. Tonight it has been confirmed that Fabio Capello will award his with his first cap.

Its not been all rosy for the young striker. He really needs a haircut and has been involved in multiple assault charges, contributing to a "bad boy" reputation. This has lead some to suggest that he is unfit to play for England with such a lifestyle. What? England players are picked based on life style? this must be new!

A quick look through the England squad shows countless fights, affairs and controversy amongst even (or especially) the darlings of the English game. Rio Ferdinand, the England captain, was unable to play for England during a major tournament because of a drugs ban, and has accumulated four driving bans along with having made a sex tape in Aiya Napa with Frank "83 caps for England" Lampard. Good example for young players? The vice captains no better: Steven Gerrard, in December 2008, punched a man in a Southport bar with "the speed and accuracy of a professional boxer". 

Wayne Rooney, a rival for Carroll's position, is a serial infidel and his short fuse and petulance have given his team problems on and off the pitch - yet he is worshipped by the media and the FA. And then there's John Terry, yes his colossal breach of trust early this year may have lost him his captaincy, but he wasn't known for being a great guy before that. He was involved in drunkenly mocking a group of American tourists in the wake of the 9/11 attacks, he was arrested in 2002 for bottling a bouncer and was recently found to be accepting money to give tours of the Chelsea training ground.

Whilst these are the clearest examples of the big players being no cleaner than Carroll, the England team sheet reads like a list of controversies. Ashley Cole and Peter Crouch have been in trouble recently along with many in the past.

If Andy Carroll has an inappropriate lifestyle for international selection, England need a whole new team. To be honest that would probably be a good thing.

Alright then, Lionel. I'll give Amnesty International a call (bit of a rant)

Barcelana are at it again with their own unique brand of tapping up - getting the players to publicly talk about the targeted player inevitably arriving at the club in a clear bit to unsettle a player under contact at another club. Fabregas has been courted by his international teammates all summer in a way that is completely disrespectful to Arsenal and does nothing more than show their arrogance. They have also done this to Javier Mascherano to the extent that he wouldn't play in Liverpool's defeat to Manchester City last Monday, but the last line of the ridiculous procession of headlines and soundbites is the most outrageous by far.

Lionel messi, a fanstic footballer but clearly a bit of an idiot and a lot of a twatt, pleaded that Liverpool act "humanely" and release Javier Mascherano. Oh the humanitarian injustice of being stuck in a contract where you exchange playing your favourite game for more money than you can spend! In the real world, outside playing football and driving a Bentley, people don't have a problem with fulfilling their contractual obligations - that's why they signed them. I can't think why Javier Mascherano's agent would allow him to sign a contact at Liverpool if it was violating his human rights - oh hang on - maybe it was because before Liverpool rescued him he was festering in West Ham's reserve team and disappearing off the radar of many top clubs.  Mascherano needs to be more grateful, and not see it as "inhumane" for his club to expect him to act according to his contract.

Can Maradona make things better for Villa?

After Sunday's performance and the catastrophic scoreline to boot, Villa's fans are rightfully despairing, having gone from being a team sniffing round the top four with a progressive and highly rated manager and some of England's growing talent to being a managerless club deserted by their star player and suffering the humiliation of a drubbing by a newly promoted side.  It is clear that to stop this downward slide Randy Lerner will have to act fast to replace Martin O'Neil with the right man. Why, you might ask, have I mentioned a comical flop of an international manger , Diego Maradona, in connection with the vacancy?

I would consider him because, while he may be a risk, he is the only option that does not symbolise targeting an accepting a mid-table, stable position instead of chasing after Spurs and Man City. The other names Steve Bruce, and Bob Bradley don't strike me as the sort to take the club forward, but can certainly slow their descent.

Maradona However has something special about him, hes a bit different, and will draw attention to Villa from around the world. He may be a madman, but he can attract more players and increase global support for what is not a glamourous club. When Maradona came to visit his Argentine at Melwood, the Liverpool players queued up to meet him. There are not many opposition managers who will have Steven Gerrard and Fernando Torres clambering to shake their hand, as if they had taken the position of an ordinary football fan. Maradona is regarding as being as close to a god as a man can be the man on the street of Buenos Aires  and by Argrentine footballers he is, god, Allah, Shiva, Zeus, Thor, Osiris and Poseidon combined - hes probably even Yoda too.  While I don't see Lionel Messi Lining up in claret and blue next season,  there would certainly be a draw for many Argentine players and also for other admirers of perhaps the finest ever player of the game. When they want to come it makes them cheaper. Mascherano? Aguero? If one comes the appeal grows.

The madness surrounding Diego Maradona comes with the genius, but thats the point, he is a footballing genuis, and once he gets in to his stride in the management game he may be able to prove it. Surely a player with such complete ability must have an impecable understanding of the game and will be able to spot things and change things. As a man manager he seems to have it easy, so many players have so much respect for the man that it helps him motivate them, and his passion is undeniable. While the cynics may find his touchline antics amusing there are some players who I'm sure would find this enthusiasm contagious - perhaps not those with a British mentality but some jibbering, emotional foreigners may join in in shedding tears with him and be surged to victory.

On the other hand the great player hasn't been a great manger so far, complete with his own 6-0 humiliation in Bolivia and if he can so effectively stifle Lionel Messi, what could he door to Ashley Young? It would be a sad sight to see Maradona as the villans' villan, jumping around as they struggle to retain npower league 2 status. The allure of Maradona comes from the fact that he is exotic, ellusive, never having played in England, and for many only cropped up every four years to excite and delight at the World cup. His goals had that added romanticis and his disgraces could be put at greater distance when he wasn't conducting his affairs at Old Trafford. Even his lows, scoring nothing but drug enduced highs for a time when we heard so little from him, other than the odd photo of a sad (and fat) case, far far away in a different world, made his seem more of a story and less of just "some guy". So my worry is that if he were to take up office at an familiar football club in a rainy West Midlands city, sipping pints with a fat, bald brummie, and appear every saturday desperatly clutching at anything that might inspire his mid table team to victory, then one of footballs greatest heroes and most iconic figures, would cease to be what he seemed to be and no longer represent footballing dreams.

Fuck it, what do I care? What my teams in 17th position and losing three-nil to Man City I'd gladly have the comic relief of a little man running around in suit or a gem of a press conference. Come -on Diego the premier league wants you!

Relapse

Its been a while, since my last post. I meant to post from South Africa but couldn't find a decent computer and afterwards entered the dry off season. But over the past two weekends football has reclaimed its rightful place and the forefront of our lives and this weekend has delivered everything necessary for a full Premier League hit after the agonising cold turkey that is summer.

We have seen fairly tale upsets such as Blackpool's first Premier League game ending in not only a victory for the new boys in town, but an emphatic trampsing of a Wigan side that did not look like seasoned premier league opposition. This adds the the less surprising one sided goals fests like that enjoyed at Stamford Bridge as the top flight hit West Brom like an icy shower.

The anticipation surrounding Manchester City's new look side came to and anticlimax as the most exiting team Mancini could imagine consisted of three holding players and no imagination, but City fans will be delighted with the form of their 'keeper Joe Hart who demonstrated just how poor a decision it was to let a West Ham player defend England's goal with an enchanting display against and dangerous looking Spurs. At the other end of  spectrum there was an array of goal keeping errors to feast on, from the standard failure to hold on the the ball (Carson) to the inability to protect the near post (Almunia) to comically bundling the ball into your own net (Reina, to be fair he was being fouled by that dirty Frenchman).

We've already seen players give a Fine display to (probably) round off their time at a club (Milner) and others walk out from training in a less dignified (probable) end to their contract (N'Zogbia).

We've seen spectacular goals such as David Jones's volleyed free-kick against Stoke and had the pleasure of seeing Aberdeen top the SPL courtesy of a hatrick of Paul Hartley penalties on his debut and Sheffield Wednesday struggle in the 3rd flight of English football.

But what does all this mean? What can we take from this? I'll tell you one thing: MY FANTASY LEAGUE TEAM IS FUCKED!

What Lions?

Lacklustre, not even good enough to be frustrating, England are doing their thing: disappointing us all. It is little surprise that the team were boo'd off the pitch and they oughtn't complain. The defence was rickety, the midfield lacked spark and I'm not sure If the attack really existed beyond a donkey and a ghost.

I've always defended Heskey's place in the England team, on the basis that other strikers play well with him and he often comes up with a good bit of hold up and link up play, but when he's clearly not making Rooney play well, its difficult to justify his selection. If Heskey plays you want to have two strikers in and around the box, close to each other and well serviced, this is how hes involved himself in some fantastic strike partnerships such as with Michael Owen and Amr Zaki. Tonight though, Capello seemed to think that in Heskey he had a quick young thoroughbred with a good touch - and that he really didn't. Heskey was chasing long balls all night, or trying to run at the defender. A moment that summed up the night was when he ran down the right channel, nearly fell over doing an ineffective stepover, then sliced a cross over the crossbar. This isn't Heskey's fault, we all know Heskey can't run, do stepovers or cross, but he was put in a position where he had to. When he wasn't auditioning for a Nike ad he was found loitering on the wing. This presents us with three questions: how will he get to the long ball played down the wing? What's he going to do when he gets there and has to beat a defender or cross or? And who's going to head it in when he's crossing it and Rooney's venturing so deep he's almost a sweeper. Of course questions two and three are only academic as Heskey will never successfully engineer a good crossing opportunity. I don't blame Heskey for England's performance; I feel sorry for him as he is a prime example of Capello's poor decisions and reluctance to change things that don't work.

Playing Gerrard on the Left may not have seen such stupidity at half past seven but after being ineffective for an hour, it would surely be better to try Joe Cole on the wing and free Gerrard to influence the game, as England's best moments came when Gerrard broke position. Instead, when Capello brought off Heskey he replaced him with another uninspiring striker and when he brought off Lennon he again made a like for like replacement, bring on Shaun Wright-Phillips. Yes both of these substitutes looked livlier than the starters but tactically nothing was changed and in the score nothing changed.

Englands defence may not fill us with confidence but that is a problem for later in the tournament....IF there is a later. Against Slovenia Fabio will have to arrange an effective attack out of Rooney, Gerrard, Lampard, Cole and Lennon. Difficult? Surely not!

If he can't motivate the team, just show them the Carlsberg advert!

Green's Fingers

My oh my, what a howler! Robert Green now takes his seat alongside Paul Robinson, Scott Carson and David Seaman on the bench of 'keepers who have humiliated themselves in an England shirt in recent years. He has also upheld a fine English tradition of disappointing in major tournaments.

But the Question now, of who should keep goal against Algeria, is thrown into everyone's minds. Often when a player makes a mistake a manager should show their faith in them by continuing to select them and support them through a tricky patch, otherwise the player can degrade completely into a twitching bag of nerves. Capello, should not, and I expect he will not, do this for Green; this is not a league campaign, it is a world cup, there is no more room for error and unless we manage to injure both David James and Joe Hart, we will not need Green again this tournament. As for him returning to his club a mess, I couldn't give a sun dried poodle shit is he struggles at West Ham next season - in fact I'd quite enjoy it.

That's it settled then. Drop Green. That leaves us with David James and Joe Hart. Calamity James or the man that's impressed the Premier League this season. I'm going to have to go with James. When you've just had a Keeper with little experience at international level or in big games screw up so spectacularly it would be unwise to replace his with someone younger, less experienced and perhaps just as shaken as Green. David James, at 39 years of age, has played 50 games for his country and in a career spanning 822 first team games, has played in cup finals, European competitions and made a myriad of amusing errors. The important thing is that he has learned how to recover from these errors and has the experience to stabilise the back five.

But although the goalkeeper is the most talked about problem with the England team last night, it is not the most pressing. Capello will be asking today how Rooney, the advertised talisman and messiah, managed to disappear for much of the game, how England can become more clinical infront of goal, how his team will manage without any pace between his centrebacks and how he managed to make such ineffectual substitutions.

The one positive England can take from the game is this man - Stevie G.